The Alchemical Underpinnings of Christmas As They Pertain To The Way Of The Path Of The Booze Wizard

Dear Brothers and Sisters in Zen Boozeism,

As you must know by now, Thanksgiving is a pretty tough nut to crack when it comes to extracting Alchemical underpinnings. Thankfully, the symbolism of Christmas is rife with Alchemical overtones, so we shouldn’t have too much of a problem this time.

Christmas (or Yule, or Solstice, or whatever you happen to call it-)  takes place around the time of the year where just for a day, there are equal amounts daylight and night time. The significance of this should be obvious to all Booze Wizards. Equality and balance are the treasures one acquires by studying an esoteric path. Whether or not one is speaking of balancing emotions and logic, thoughts and reality, or bringing about an internal stasis of any sort the concept of balance is, or should be at the top of every wizard’s list.

The Winter Solstice, which happens around Christmas, is a perfect day to set aside some time to balance one’s inner checkbook. Are you allowing your soft side to hold your hard side? Is your hard side supporting your soft side? It’s difficult to tell unless you take a look within.

An issue of balance particular to the booze wizard is in regards to how much one should drink. This is a good question and the answer is different for everyone, but there are a few guidelines. A Booze Wizard will usually come to understand at some point or another that too much booze is just as much of a drag as too little. Unfortunately, there is not an exact ingestion limit that fits all those who walk the Path Of The Way Of The Booze Wizard. You’ll just have to figure it out on your own. Try to stay mildly intoxicated, but stop when the urge to say stupid things arises. Performing the ritual of drinking on the Winter Solstice while thinking about internal balance is a good way to find your limits. All the instructions for the ritual are in the title, sometimes it’s easy like that.

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The Alchemicial Underpinnings of Thanksgiving

Dear Brothers and Sisters in Zen Boozeism,

What could Thanksgiving, a holiday dedicated eating too much and genocide, possibly have to do with have to do with the practice of Alchemy, as it applies to the Way of the Path of the Booze Wizard?

I’ve been thinking about that myself all month and can’t say I’ve much to show for my pondering. That doesn’t mean there aren’t any Alchemical underpinnings to Thanksgiving, just that they are rather obscured- occulted even.

As we know, Alchemy is the practice of turning something into a better version of itself. As Booze Wizards, we use the gift of drunkenness to access our unconscious minds and weed out our spiritual and emotional bullshit. Theoretically becoming better versions of ourselves in the process.

As we also, most assuredly know, Thanksgiving is a holiday. One where celebrants gather together (usually in family units) and eat turkey, often while drinking too much. Then come the pies. Those delicious pies. Pies aside, this holiday, like most of them, serves as a culturally sanctioned excuse to drink a bit more than one should. Not that a Booze Wizard needs a culturally sanctioned, or any other kind of, excuse to drink.

As we may have mentioned, Thanksgiving is a time for family, that is to say, a time where you’ll be in a room filled with the people who made you, the people who made them, and maybe the people who made them, depending. There’s also usually brothers and sisters, aunts with and without uncles, and cousins. Any Booze Wizard worth their salt can see the value of getting to study the roots and variations of the genetic material what spawned them close up. To do so through the socially sanctified lens of Thanksgiving, drinking can lead to some pretty useful insights if one is able to pay attention and can avoid the siren’s song of the inexperienced drinker. Every family has at last one person that shouldn’t drink in public. Sadly, family doesn’t count as public.

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Thoughts For This Hallow’s Eve

Greetings, Brothers and Sisters in Zen Boo!ism,

As you know, Halloween is a holiday. All holidays come with a different set of rules that makes them different from not only every other non-holiday, but also each other. On this day, the veil between the living and the dead is said to thin, allowing for easier communication between spirits and living folk. While interesting, this is not the Boo!ze Wizard’s main focus for celebrating.

A Boo!ze Wizard’s main interest should be in what they are going to dress up as for whatever festivities they have planned.

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A Primer on Zen Boozism Lesson 06

Dear Brothers and Sisters in Zen Boozism,

This is the last lesson in our course. We’ve been through some crazy stuff along the way. By now, you should be fairly well versed in performing the Sacred Sample and practicing some kind of daily meditation.

If you have been doing those things over the last few months, you are well on your way to becoming a Booze Wizard and have may have noticed some changes in your demeanor and/or internal thought processes. Modifying the external thought process is outside the scope of this course. I’m not even sure that would be something helpful for someone to do.

For this lesson we’re going to learn a new ritual, The Sacred Game.

You may be familiar with the concept of ‘drinking games’, which are games people play to make drinking more fun.

The Sacred Game is a little different from other drinking games in that it’s not meant to make drinking more fun. Drinking is fun enough as it is. The purpose of our drinking game is to keep one’s mind from going over and over the same old thoughts again and again. This is a useful game to play while sober, or not drinking, as well.

If you are going to sacrifice your sobriety on the alter of booze-fueled self evolution, you better have a plan for when your thoughts turn to bullshit. The Sacred Game will give you something else to think about other than how horrible 6th grade was.

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