Straight From The Fridge August 2017

Greetings unevolved, non-Ultra Violet Adult souls and troubled readers. I, the Rev. Dr. Hugo Holmesnow am back with the first installment of my new and life threatening changing MK Ultra Violet System For Mass Healing On A Global Scale.

As you surely remember, last time I used this column to announce that I discovered that I am the first of the next generation of human evolution. I have surpassed Indigo, Crystal, and Rainbow children and have become an “Ultra Violet Adult”. I also made many promises about how this revelation about myself will enable me to heal you on a massive scale never before seen in this dimension. I do not plan on disappointing you.

As I’m sure you will be happy to know, I have spent this past month eagerly exploring my new, superior, Ultra Violet Adult body in many, many places. Sometimes I performed my explorations in public without anyone noticing. One time I explored myself to my satisfaction on the steps of the public library, and another time while in line at the grocery store and the unenlightened Non-Ultraviolet around me did not notice anything unusual. The most satisfying of all was my exploration in the local post office. They will think twice before they mess with me again.

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Straight From The Fridge July 2017

:::::Attention!::::Big News Regarding the Future of humanity!::::Breaking News!::::

::::We Interrupt Your Personal Growth and Healing to Announce A Better Way For Me To Facilitate Your Personal Growth And Healing!::::

The Disgrace of The Indigo, Crystal, and Rainbow Child Movement

Are you or someone you know an Indigo, Crystal, or a Rainbow Child? I used to think I was all of those all at once, but I have seen through my ignorance. I cannot believe I functioned under the delusion that I was somehow special because I was something as common as an Indigo/Crystal/Rainbow Child.

I, too, can be wrong sometimes. It does not happen often but I am strong enough to admit my errors. You know this about me, as I have just revealed it to you. This is not all I’m about to reveal to you.

Continue reading and revelations will happen…

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Straight From The Fridge June 2017

Last time we met I explained how this column must evolve in order to meet both my needs as a Life Coach and your needs as an advice need-er. We agreed that the column will now be a Non-Traditional Life Altering Advice Dispersement Channel or N.T.L.A2.D.C for short instead of whatever primitive model of ancient incompetence it was prior to now.

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Straight From The Fridge May 2017

 

To My Readers,

You may have recently noticed a slight dip in the quality of my normally high quality wisdom. I assure you that this has nothing to do with the recent allegations against me that you may or may not have heard about. I am not going to tell you about the so-called allegations. That would do my reputation no good. Remember, you should not be concerned about my personal life, your personal life is in no shape to judge another “normal” person, let alone a life-coach of my stature.

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Straight From The Fridge

To my reader(s):

It has come to my attention that you do not understand why I am here or why I write this column every month. It is not for my health and well being, that much is for sure. Some of you seem to think that I am here to solve all your petty problems such as “Why is my husband sneaking out of the window every night?” or “Where is my wife? I haven’t seen her in like, 3 weeks.” or even worse:

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